Frailty Begets Spirituality

‘Yeah, I’m a spiritual person.’

~Patrick Wilson

When I tell people I am spiritual,  they tend to take a step back from me.  Maybe they think spiritual automatically means that I am religious.  There is a difference between religious and spiritual.  Although I am catholic and I am currently deferred from a Bachelor of Religion, I am not religious.  I love how faith helps people to overcome tragedies, it interests me.

Spirituality is a way of life for me.  It is a way to incorporate kindness into my life and the other lives that I get to touch.  It teaches me to be grateful for what is.  It has taught me the importance of simplicity.  Spiritual means I focus and try to focus more on the human spirit, I try to move beyond the material aspect of life to find a deeper meaning.  Spiritual doesn’t mean that I don’t have feelings.  That I don’t get sad sometimes or depressed for that matter.

Spiritual definitely doesn’t mean that I can’t find dirty jokes funny or that I haven’t smoked a couple of joints in my time.  Friends and family that have known me a long time know that there are two parts to me the silly childlike smiley Kylie who likes to table dance at parties and the spiritual reflective Kylie.  It is the duality of me.  I can’t be one without the other.  It completes me.  Being spiritual helps me to fill that huge void inside of me with putty, you know, that piece of you that always feels like there is something missing.  I’ll get there.

Yes, I do believe that God exists, I see god in you, he is in me, he is in everything.  I believe we are all connected, we are all one and what you do to someone else you are really doing to yourself.  I live and breathe gratitude.  It makes me feel good to express gratitude for what this life offers and all of its beauty.  Life is simply amazeballs.  I do talk to my Angels and I do talk to other people’s angels.  This does not make me special.  Everyone has the ability to talk to their angels.  They are here to help us.  There’s been times where I have been so low where I can’t see a way out and they are always there to drag me back up, without a doubt.  They make me smile, love me unconditionally.

This developing spiritually is what keeps me going.  It keeps me positive, it helps me to remain motivated.  There are moments when I still get caught up in the shitty stuff, guilt, judgement and pain, however I am beginning to spend less time in this space.  I now understand my connection to the universe.  I really do look at life through rose-coloured glasses and I struggle to see the negative side to any situation.  Call it naive if you like.  It helps me to sleep at night and that’s all that matters.  My goal in life is to try to help others to feel the innate happiness and know that this is the ‘normal’ space that we can live in.  It is available to all of us.

I believe what you say you create.  I don’t like to focus on the negatives but you can always tell me about your problems.  I would love to be able to lend an ear.  I might help you to see the positives of the situation however, it is what I do.  I am a healer so I can tell when you are sick, I feel your sadness if you are depressed.  It sometimes means that I need to be alone… I need a lot of alone time.  Please don’t take it personally.  I am different, weird and spiritual mixed with a bit of silly, sarcastic, funny and loving for good measure.

I have always been spiritual.  I remember as far back as two asking my Abuela (grandmother) to put a movie on about the Virgin Mary.  At sixteen I was writing and drawing spiritual insights.  But at nineteen I was binge drinking and partying.  I have some stories that would surprise you and others that will enlighten you.

I no longer drink, I am vegetarian, I don’t eat sugar or preservatives, I can’t go to loud concerts because I can feel peoples energy.  For fun now I go to the beach, eat at organic cafe’s and enjoy nature with my kids.  At the core I am still the same Smiley Kylie, the spiritual side of me is a lovely reminder to be a kind person.  I am not going to try to push my beliefs down your throat, although I would like to be able to chat about the things that are of interest to me, like I would like to hear what is of interest to you.  There may be something we can teach each other.

So, if you know someone who has just gone spiritual know that they are the same person.  They are just trying to make a better version of the original copy, trying to feel closer to home and aiming to make the world a better place.  Becoming spiritual is merely a way to define their new quest in life to find pure happiness.  In that respect I guess we are all spiritual.  It takes great courage to come out of the spiritual closet.  I can say now say with pride, fear doesn’t live here anymore.

Originally posted on:  http://mindfulmummyhealing.com

Light and love and all things nice,

Kylie Riordan x

Happy Kids Happiness Day!

‘Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. The third is to be kind.’

Henry James

Our First Kids Happiness Day was a success!  I came up with the concept a couple of days ago.  I was thinking about how I could incorporate kindness more into my life and for some reason the kids sprang to my mind and the idea began to blossom.  The more I thought about it the happier I got.  The more excited I found the prospect of seeing pure joy in live action.

Kids happiness day would be a day that I would dedicate to my children, they could do anything they wanted, eat all the sugar they wanted.  I would play with them uninterrupted.  A day where there is no worry about messy hairs and household chores, where I would be completely present with them.  I wanted to show the kids that although it is important to eat a healthy balanced diet, it is also important to nourish their soul with happiness and love.  I would not check Facebook (ok, I was sneaky I checked it once), there would be no cleaning, no cooking, no adult conversations.  I was not going to be too tiered to play any game, no matter what.  I vowed that this day would be a day that they would remember forever.

I woke them up dressed up in a ghost costume.  I drew beautiful colourful cards with sayings about what mummy and daddy loved about them.  There was no gifts, I wanted the experience of happiness to be their gift, not the fleeting moments of happiness that material gifts give.  The day of happiness was purely for them.

Ice cream and cheeky grins on the breakfast menu!

On this day there would be Ice cream and MM’S for breakfast (I had heart palpitations giving my kids ice cream for breakfast), they were allowed to mess their clothes and I was not allowed to think about how much mess they made and how much cleaning I would have to do the next day.  I wanted to let their imagination sore. It was a way for me to show how grateful I am for the gift they have given me, the best present of all, unconditional love.  During the day I overheard the kids talking about doing something nice for me for Valentine’s Day.  They are paying the kindness forward.

I realised that performing acts of kindness makes you feel uncomfortable sometimes because its something you disagree with or it doesn’t make you happy.  I felt uncomfortable giving them Hot Dogs for dinner.  I moved past it, this day was for them.  There was Lego, water balloons, dress ups, dancing, puzzles, painting mummy, jumping into the canal, a play at the play centre, bubbles, hot dogs (with bacon), watching movies past bedtime on the sofa, cookies and chocolates.  It made me happy to make them happy, although there was tears once…  I’m sure it was a sugar low.

Freedom, Happiness!

To be honest I was stressing about the day after.  I had images of naughty kids after the sugar highs but there was an all-encompassing peace in our house, a sense of oneness.  I would not change this feeling for anything in the world.  I heart that I had this day with them.  There are reasons why my kids don’t eat sugar  though… ha, ha! More importantly I am not going to wonder to myself why I didn’t slow down and spend more time with my kids.  I am going to make the most of what time we have together, now.

The day brought up a memory from my last year of high school and of a work experience placement I had at a primary school.  One of my teachers Mr. Murray came and spoke to the school about how I was doing.  My report wasn’t that great, pretty shitty actually.  Mr. Murray reported to me that although I worked exceptionally well with the children, I didn’t work so well with the adult staff.  Maybe it was because I heard them gossiping about 12-year-old kids in the lunchroom?  I’m not sure.  Maybe it was because I love to be in the presence of kids, where there is no judgment, where I see only love and despite the adversity that some kids face I see hope?  This memory was a reminder of why I feel so at peace when I am living in the moment with children and also why I quit education at university.

Our three beautiful cherubs!

I feel like I have an even stronger connection with my kids from this one day, its palpable.  There is a special energy in our house.  You are the best mummy in the world was said more times than I can remember, I’m not, to them I am and that’s all that matters.

I use to have this poor me attitude about being home alone with the kids all the time, lately, especially after this day I can’t rub the smile off my face, my attitude has changed.  My kids make my days yummy, they are not a hassle, how is that even possible?  Just look at their gorgeous faces!  It was a lovely feeling to be able to play and watch them and let go. It was easier than not being present.  I can’t shake this feeling that I got way more out of the day then they did.

Sugar High!

I am now ready for what future lessons my kids have to teach me, I could never have imagined the lessons that I would learn from our first kids happiness day.  It was fun to get dirty and really play.  I use to before responsibility bit me in the butt… ah the freedom!

For most adults their ultimate goal in life is happiness. Children are already there, why is this?  They live in the now.  When you ‘fully’ experience this moment and live only for this moment, there is only this moment.  If I’m playing water balloons with the kids and I’m listening to their outrageous laughing, that is all there is.

Late night movies!

I am looking forward to the next annual kids happiness day and so are the kids.  Bring on the 8th of February 2015 and all of its joy.  A joyful heart is the best medicine for the soul.  I have overdosed on this medicine and I highly recommend it.

May all kids across the world feel happy, know love and embrace their special uniqueness!  The future of earth’s happiness depends on their happiness.  Bless their little souls.  A belated Happy Kids Happiness Day!  Remember in life you can never have too many Happy’s!

Originally posted on: http://mindfulmummyhealing.com

Love and light and all things nice,

Kylie  Riordan x

*Disclaimer:  All my blogs are intended to empower you and enable you to take responsibility to make the best choices for yourself.  The choices that I make in MY life may not be the best choices for you.  I do not judge anyone who has different opinions to me.  Kudos to you for choosing your own path in life.  I merely am a human being trying to make my life the best it can be whilst sharing what I have learned along the way.  I am mindful mummy trying to heal and master the art of making one person smile a day… at the least!

Train Ride with Soul!

“Happiness, not in another place but this place…not for another hour, but this hour. ” ― 

Walt Whitman 

If I could pin point the day that has inspired my life the most it would be the day I choose to begin to consciously live in the moment, for the moment and be completely present.  On this seemingly ordinary day it hit me like a ton of bricks and I knew that I needed to change.  I will start with just me.  Collectively our Western culture might need to change.

I was pregnant with my youngest daughter at the time and unable to drive because of my epilepsy so I decided to catch a train to Brisbane City to see my Obstetrician. I was a tad bit excited; it had been years since my last train ride. The train I was about to board was the business rush train, everybody on their way to the grindstone.  Lucky for me I was pregnant so one lovely young gentleman gave me his seat.

The train was packed like a can of sardines.  I  put my bag on my lap, got comfortable, fixed my clothes and I looked up briefly as I was fumbling in my bag for my phone.  What I saw though brought on one of my biggest ah ha moments to date… every single person on that train that day was looking at a phone or tablet, except the elderly man sitting next to me and of course me… now.   I quickly slid my phone back into my bag.  I tried to make eye contact with someone, but nothing.  I tried to make sense of what had happened to society, nothing.  I felt a deep overwhelming sadness.  Luckily the lovely man next to me felt my pain and he made a big joke about how talking to people was so out of fashion these days.  So guess what?  That’s we did for the next hour, we talked, we laughed we were present.  I never really was very fashionable.

On this train ride I got to meet someone new and have a laugh, the worry about wasting an hour of my life in boredom was gone.  I  stopped caring 10 minutes into the ride that people were cranky with us because we were being too noisy… laughing.

I made a pack with myself that day… a deep one on one inner dialogue with myself.  I vowed from that moment on that I would endeavour to embrace every single moment in this life, remembering that every single morsel of this life is precious and sublime (even the shitty stuff because it enables me to really appreciate the good stuff).  I am going to make an effort to stop holding onto the past or worry about a future that is still unwritten.  Who cares if I’m on a train, this may be my last day and lets be frank train rides can change lives (Here! Here!).  Remembering to live in the moment has made my life pretty simplistic but has also brought me oodles of happiness.  I am no longer looking for the next big thing that will make me happy;  I choose to live happy!

How do you feel in this moment?  Do you have thoughts about future events?  Is your mind racing with things that you need to do (hopefully not too much because than that would mean that my blog is boring you)?  How would your life feel if you were happy with what you had and needed nothing extra?  Would you feel Joy?  Does it make you feel nervous?  It is a pretty incredible feeling being happy with what is.  There is a special energy that is attracted to what is, this energy will bring you more things in your life to be grateful for… the bigger things.  It is the ego talking when it says I will be happy when I have this or that, not your soul.  Happiness with what is equals a constant feeling of gratefulness. All this from a train ride!

Originally posted on:  http://mindfulmummyhealing.com

Love and light and all things nice,

Kylie Riordan x

Lessons from Parenting School

These are some of the things that I have learned over the short amount of time that I have been attending Parenting School, seven years and counting.  These things have been trialled and tested, they work for me.  They help me get through days when I no longer can cope.  These things help me to still see the beauty in parenting particularly on the harder days.  Parenting has helped me learn a lot about myself.

Parenting 101

Don’t sweat the small stuff.  Kids are going to do naughty things.  You just need to workout what are the important naughty things and what is worth just forgetting.  Putting six toilet rolls down the toilet and trying to flush it is one of the naughty things I forgot I just got my husband to clean it so that I didn’t have to worry about it.

Parenting 102

It wasn’t until I had kids that I realised that I can’t sing.  The number of times that I have heard mummy please stop singing makes me wonder how I played Singstar for so many years thinking I sounded good without an adult telling me any different.  I love kids honesty… just not when they are talking about me.

Parenting 103

Kids are going to lie  It’s important to not make a big deal about it.  It makes them feel guilty.  Guilt is never a good outcome.  I have learned that educating them about the importance of honesty is more important than the lie itself.  Children will make mistakes and this is how they learn.  But they should never be made to feel guilty over something they have done.  Especially if it is their first lie.

Parenting 104

Things I thought that were disgusting before don’t really bother me anymore.  Like having a number three squirted in your face by a newborn baby, bah!  Your children’s poo doesn’t smell half as bad as other children’s.  I have had my children’s poo all over me.  I have tasted it (don’t ask me).  But give me another kid with a stinky nappy and that’s it for me.

Parenting 105

It really doesn’t matter how messy your house is.  Let people judge.  If you have children your house is going to be messy.  There will be fingerprints on windows, food hidden under couches.  As long as your house is semi-hygienic… (notice how I said semi)  that’s all that maters.  They do grow too quickly to be spending your time polishing.  Although it is okay to waste 10 minutes before people come over to clean as fast as you possibly can.

Parenting 105

Children really do need routine.  I don’t know about you but I get extremely stressed when I don’t know where I am going and what is happening next or if I have to wait another 2 hours for food.  I’m not talking about order.  I am talking about routine.  Bed time at 6, bath before bed,  dinner at 5 that sort of thing.  I believe in free play through the day, but routine really does work.  I’ve done both, no routine is way too stressful.

Parenting 106

I wish I had spent more time teaching my children new words.  There are some days they say the word Mummy way too many times.  I should have spent more time teaching them to say Daddy, my bad.  I will remember that for next time if  I am brave enough to go for number four (more like if my husband will allow me to have number 4).

Parenting 107

I really should have paid more attention at school and not spent so much of my time off with the fairies as more than one of my teachers reported.  It is a skill that I need, it would help me to pay attention to my children more often and not say yes to things I really mean no too.   I always have loved fairies.

Parenting 108

It really is important to be a good role model for your children.  I have had terrible self-confidence and I don’t want to pass it onto my children.  I will never say anything negative about myself in front of them.  I have had my kids point out how funny my belly looks with all of its stretch marks and although this is something I am really self-conscious about I tell them it looks beautiful to me because that is where they lived for 9 months…  they no longer comment on it.

Parenting 109

I thought becoming a parent would make me into an overnight Domestic goddess.  I never ironed before I had kids.  My seven year old asked me what an Iron is the other day.  I need to find a new position to apply for.  I don’t meet the criteria for domestic goddess… go figure?

Parenting 110 is missing.  I have no excuse… maybe baby brain?

To finish off… unlike most university degrees you can’t get your masters in parenting, parenting is constant learning, no parent is perfect.  It is hugely rewarding with the most amazing certification at the end, beautiful children that love you unconditionally (especially if you let them watch Spongebob instead of doing their homework).  This school is worth trying your best at.  It’s okay to get a few fail marks.  You will be guaranteed to get an A for something, it may not be an A in the same class as one of your mummy friends, but know that your kids think you are the best mummy in the world.

 Orignally posted on http://mindfulmummyhealing.com

Love and light and all things nice,

Kylie Riordan x

Nothingness in Meditation

Prayer is when you talk to God; meditation is when you listen to God.

-Diana Robinson

I have never really meditated.  Only guided meditation.  Praying is my thing.  I pray because I like to talk a lot… praying gives me the opportunity to talk even more.  I struggle with silence.  When there is silence you can guarantee that if you’re in a room with me, I will start to talk faster than a bullet.  I know that when people hop off the phone to me sometimes they have a headache and that they had forgotten everything that we had just talked about.

I believe there is a part of me that fears silence.  If there is silence does it mean that I have to listen to the voice in my head that is negative or will that fear that I have pushed down rise again?  I’ve worked so hard for this to not happen.

Lately I’ve been feeling a huge nudge to meditate, not guided meditation.  Just sit by myself with nothing else, no music, no talking, nothing.  The idea initially scared the hell out of me.  So I jumped in. I decided to set aside a good two hours to meditate the other day.  When you are a mum of three small children two hours by yourself is better than chocolate.  Nothing competes.  There are a dozen things I could be doing, but this nudge from my angels to mediate was getting stronger.

Recently I have put so much energy into making my body healthy, my soul enlightened; yet I am still not meditating, from my understanding it is one of the most integral steps for developing spiritually, equally as important for good mental and physical health.  It was time to start meditating I was ready.  Praying wasn’t enough anymore.  The visions I had of me meditating weren’t good.  I had thoughts of my mind wondering of me getting a sore back, bored or just over it.

I decided to sit on my bedroom floor (not very special).  The only thing I decided to do was hold onto rosary beads.  I felt guided to do this.  I just sat.  I must admit after the first half hour into the meditation I had fewer thoughts racing into my head.  At about the Forty-Five minute mark I could feel a wave of energy through my body and a loud ringing sound in my ear. Then at one hour everything went completely silent, I was aware of nothingness.  There was blackness; I no longer could feel any body part.  I felt disconnected from everything but connected at the same time.  Another ten minutes after this I felt peace.  Peace is the only word I have that can describe it.  It was beautiful.

Initially I had thoughts of seeing guides or angels or having prophetic visions but there was nothing… a whole lot of nothing.  The nothing was divine, however.  Had I just entered an altered state of consciousness? A place fear no longer resides, where there is stillness, where you no longer feel judgment?  I don’t know, but I now get why people meditate  and I have to do it again.  My energy body feels larger yet lighter.  It is palpable.

The next day after my second meditation there was just peace.  A deep knowing that this fear inside of me is just an illusion, a story.  It is safe for me to be quiet.  I’m only at day two.  I can’t imagine what twenty years of meditating is going to do for me.  I feel blessed I listened to my nudge (quiet forceful yet friendly nudge).

I totally recommend meditation if you haven’t already tried it.  You don’t need any props just a quiet place where you wont be interrupted.  Remember to just let go.  There will come a point where there is only peace.  Remember to ground yourself when you finish.  You need to return back to your body.  You can ground yourself by putting your feet on the grass or touching your body.  Mediation is the way the universe gives you all the guidance and information you need.

I don’t feel the need to talk as much anymore.  I’m sure my husband will be happy with this.

Love and light and all things nice,

Kylie Riordan x

Originally Posted on http://mindfulmummyhealing.com